Questions with No Answers

Susan's Tomato Bush Oct. 2012

When I came home 
from work this afternoon,

I knew I would write 
this blogpost  tonight, but

didn’t know what I would write.

How did I choose?

I went to the garden to see what I could dig up - to shift and sift my thoughts.

In an hour, I picked up a half dozen windfall pears - one real nice one - firm and bronzed.

checked the miniscule size of squash and pumpkins,

slender flat pole beans that I didn’t really expect

counted at least ten tomatoes on my tomato 'bush' 

then tucked daffodil bulbs under the soil

covered them with crispy fallen leaves

dug up some well rooted weeds at grasses edge

yet words failed to flow - not even a drip!

You may have read my last three posts.

They were about this addiction thing.

After writing these three posts, I realized that

despite years of working with addicts and alcoholics

I barely know a scratch about the actual workings of addiction.

Anymore than I know about 

what goes on in my plants

to produce fruit.

Medicine
Psychiatry 

Nursing
Social work

each have explanations. 

But what I don’t know is why it affects choice.

Choice is what it’s all about isn’t it?

People choose to be addicts and alcoholics.

Don’t they?

Or do they choose something else

and then there’s addiction for some?

But who? when? where?

Do these questions matter for the active alcoholic or addict?

Or do they matter for the individual who has never

seen

felt 

touched 

an addictive substance?

I guess I’ll just keep

looking to idea and story,

planting seeds, 

weeding the soil, and

caring for the folks who need caring for.

"Science is wonderfully equipped to answer the question 'How?'

but it gets terribly confused when you ask the question 'Why?'"

~ Erwin Chargaff