Training wheels for a little while until it’s time to be brave, maybe a wee bit foolhardy, then to push life’s pedals ~ no matter any cracks in the sidewalk.
“If you wait until you’re really sure,
you’ll never take off the training wheels.”
~ Cynthia Lewis, author
But I’d rather talk about the birds. It was on a morning walk a couple of days ago. Rounding the end of the Wascana Migratory Bird Sanctuary, the sight was amazing. The air was just under crisp, the sun warm, fall reddened gold with the rustle of drying bulrushes lining the shores. And beautiful birds. Birds scattered on the waters, flying in to land in groups or singles, floating and gathering as far as my eyes could see. The air was filled with the sound of these fascinating creatures calling, honking and crying to each other. This cluster close to me held more than one species. Pelicans, Canada geese, ducks, gulls and I’m sure there were cormorants in there somewhere. Even the Canada geese dove, tails up, for a soggy bottom snack! Hadn’t seen that before.
This was a much more magical Never-never Land.
“You just think lovely wonderful thoughts,” Peter explained,
“and they lift you up in the air.”
~ James Barrie
Into the breach we go
when autumn bites the air
Yet it’s not only leaves
that crumble and fall,
the distant sun that lowers,
the mischievous wind that chills.
It’s the garb that rabbits wear
From brown drab fur
slowly brightened to snow white.
Ears outline in white,
legs clean and bright
and tail a white powder puff ~
sure signs of winter in the offing.
“One goes to Nature only for hints and half-truths.
Her facts are crude until
you have absorbed them or translated them…..
It is not so much what we see as what the thing seen suggests.”
~ John Burroughs
Against All Odds
Against all odds, both Dez and the other driver, Sandra, survived what could have been a fatal crash. She had asked her sister if the other driver had been injured, but had never been given an answer. Patients weren’t allowed to visit with each other so she couldn’t do anything but ask the nurses. In the week that she was in hospital, Sandra had sent a message with her nurse Cheryl. The message was short ‘I’m ok. Just some bumps and bruises. The doctors were worried about concussion, but tests were negative. Hope you are ok. Sandra’
“I feel like I’m in school passing notes.” Dez was muttering to herself when Cheryl brought her lunch in. “Can you take this note to Sandra, please? I know we can’t see each other, but I’m answering her note. Cheryl, I know you’ve got better things to do that deliver the mail so just do your best.” Cheryl put her patient’s lunch tray on the over the bed table. She took the note from Dez and put it in her pocket. “That’s quite all right, Miss Eliot. I’ll be taking her lunch tray to her and will give it to her then. We’re actually not to be taking things from one patient to another, but I know your Covid tests were both negative. I can’t do this again, though.” Cheryl turned to go. She stopped at the door, hesitated and said “The social worker will be in this afternoon to see you about early discharge. She quickly left the room, closing the door behind her.
Dez tried to quickly ask questions “Social worker? Early discharge?” but Cheryl was already gone. “Don’t worry, dear. It’s happening to all of us that are ‘almost well’. They’re kicking the lot of us out. Oh, they keep saying ‘not enough room’, ‘we’re worked to death’, could even be those damned anti-vaxxer people that are filling everything up. Pushing the rest of us out so they can be taken care of.” Dez’s room had been so quiet before she was graced with Mrs. Gordon’s presence. Her private room was changed to a semi private in the blink of an eye with no warning. Mrs. Gordon, 95 years old if she was a day, hadn’t stopped talking since being moved in. “Yes, I saw that social worker two days ago. She wanted me out then, said it was the Doctor’s idea, but I know my Doctor, he would never let me be discharged early. I’m too old. I live alone and I don’t have family here. I told her, in no uncertain terms, that I wasn’t going anywhere. Seems the Doctor changed his mind, because that very same day I got moved in here. They just wanted me to stay in my bed and get moved along with all my things piled on top of me. I made them put me in a wheelchair and get this room all set up properly before I would even come in. It’s a good thing you’re a nice young thing with more of a brain in your head than some of these nurses, not to mention the social worker.” When Mrs. Gordon stopped to take a breath, Dez said “Mrs. Gordon, please. I need some quiet to think these things through.” Dez had tolerated her unwelcome roommate for two days. At first she was amused by this eccentric woman, as time wore on, her patience was wearing thin. “Well, all right, dear, but you mark my words. They’ll have you out of here so fast it will make your head spin.” She took a breath “Here’s that nosy social worker now, so I’ll be quiet and you can tell her that you’re not going anywhere.” Dez took a deep breath, thinking to herself that leaving early just may be a blessing in disguise.
~~~~~
“I thought I would be here for another couple of days! I still have physiotherapy scheduled……” Dez had another thought. “I haven’t even talked about my home and how I’ll manage. No one has been in here to ask me if I even have a home.” The social worker and the nurse had come in together, talking quietly, stopping suddenly when they entered the room. Dez thought they looked a little guilty and really quite frazzled. “Dez - Miss Eliot - this is Miss Anderson, the social worker. She’s come to speak with you about your home situation. The hospital is in need of beds for acute care patients. We’re filling up faster than we have places for anyone. You saw the hallways and your own room is now a semiprivate.” Cheryl looked almost in tears. Over the last week, she had cared for Dez enough that they had developed a sort of good bond. Professional but friendly. “I’m so sorry you’ve had to get the news so quickly…so suddenly.” Miss Anderson put her hand on Cheryl’s arm. A clear signal that she would take it from there. She nodded at her almost imperceptibly. “I have to go, Miss Eliot. There are new patients coming in.” She disappeared into the orderly chaos that had become a nurses’ life on the other side of the door. Miss Anderson took up the conversation. “All the staff have been working flat out, Miss Eliot. Can I sit down?”
“Oh, of course. I’ve forgotten my manners in here. I’ll just give you my information.” Miss Anderson took out her pen and note pad. “I live here in the city, have an apartment on the 8th floor across from the park and my only relative lives 7 km. outside the city.” It all came out in one breath. Even as she spoke it, she realized how frightened she was to be alone in her tiny apartment, dependent on grocery deliveries and the good graces of her sister. But due to the circumstances at the hospital, she’d already decided that she’d rather be home than in hospital another day. At least she’d be able to make a decent cup of coffee. She didn’t know about her meals though. Last time she got groceries, she had filled her freezer with pizzas. There were canned soups in the cupboard, but no fresh fruits or vegetables. Em had cleared out her fridge for her so she wouldn’t come home to the grey green rugs that may have carpeted her leftovers. Miss Anderson looked up from her notes. “Miss Eliot? Are you all right? You’re so quiet.”
“See. I told you.” The four words from the next bed were accusing and pointed.
“Oh, Yes. No, I’m just fine. Just thinking about how I’ll manage. I’m sure my sister will take me home and get me settled. How soon do you need my bed? Would it be all right if I leave today? I’ll call my sister when you’re finished with me.” Dez was quiet. “I’ll tell the nurses when I know for sure.”
~~~~~
At the Estate, the three women were following James’ advice. Cook called Giles and Joey in to help move the furniture. Giles, already at the Estate, took the call on his cell phone while he was getting ready to take Miss Em to visit her sister. Joey was not in school and only occupied with World of Warfare on his computer. He came out as soon as he was called, not knowing why they needed to move furniture just glad to be out of the house.
“Time stops for no one, no matter how unsure we are of the future.”
~ Rebekah Crane, The Upside of Falling Down
as petals dry and fall
Storing kernels of food
for the barren winter
Hope remains for
seeding the future.
“Time, Time, Time
See what’s become of me,
While I looked around for
my possibilities.”
~ Paul Simon
*edited 04Nov2023
~ sunshine blocked by dirty gray clouds built and hovering for too many decades.
True reconciliation creeps forward slowly as clouds of attitude and old laws break, blown away by the
errant winds of willingness and acceptance.
If only we are all willing to participate.
“Only from the heart can you touch the sky.”
~ Rumi
Evolution, like bureaucracy, moves slowly…
unseen and unfelt until archaeologists discover
where we have been ~ certain of the existence of the past;
gently brushing away sand and pebble
to witness the shards and remnants
of once vibrant living cultures
protected by Mother Earth ’til
revealing them to us as we walk.
“Are we being good ancestors?”
~ Jonas Salk
