Slow Down
Dez climbed into Old Faithful. Her old red car had just been to the shop. Oil change and tires were rotated. Giles, the Estate chauffeur, had referred her to this garage. She hadn’t been the best at taking care of Old Faithful, but the older it got, the more important it was. Giles had given her quite a lesson about what she needed to do. She always liked to report to Giles when Old Faithful had been taken care of, but he wouldn’t be at the Estate today. Today, she was going out to see her big sister. She and Em were going out to talk with Samuel. Dez had no idea why Em wanted her to be there, but Em asked for her to be there, so she’d be there. She had been pretty vague when Dez asked what they were going to be doing. So she just let it drop.
~~~~~
Emelina couldn’t decide which jacket she should wear. Glancing out the window, she saw clouds but thankfully no rain. She wouldn’t have to wear rain boots. She and Samuel had had many great visits, but they had just been visits between friends. This time she was going out there as his employer. It wasn’t a social call. She really wanted to call it off, but it would only be procrastinating. Reading personnel files, going to appointments at the bank and to the accountant were relatively easy. Not to begin with, but once she got going it was smooth. She’d had Brigitte with her for those meetings, but Brigitte was busy getting her school calendar set up. She did still come to the Estate but only a couple of half days a week. Em finally decided on her denim jacket, it looked more 'gardenish'. The blue leather just didn’t look right or feel right. Too much. There was still something missing. She didn’t want to do this by herself. “I wonder if……I wonder if Dez will come out? She’s probably busy….” Saying this as she punched Dez’s speed dial number, she already felt calmer.
~~~~~
He pushed his old straw hat back from his forehead, pulled his red handkerchief from his back pocket and wiped the dirt from his hands. “Now that wasn’t so bad was it, Miss Em. You looked like you’d lost your last friend when you and Miss Dez showed up.”
“I know, Samuel. You’re right - as you always are. It wasn’t bad at all. I am still uncomfortable when I have to be the boss.” Emelina had taken off her jacket, the afternoon sun too warm for a jacket. Dez had been quiet while her sister and the Estate gardener had talked. She actually felt sorry for her sister, usually so put together and controlled.
All the way from the house to the garden, Emelina had chattered about her ‘agenda’ that she had written out. “I need to remember what I want to talk about. I’m so nervous that I can’t trust my memory.” She pulled out a small notebook. “Here’s some of my questions, Dez, what do you think: “Are you worried about your job?’ - Cook said everyone was worried about their jobs. ‘Do you have everything you need to do your work?’ I know what’s in Digby’s paper work, but there’s no real listing about what kind of tools Samuel would need. ‘Is your work satisfying?’ I really think for Samuel it is. He seems to live for the land. But I just can’t be sure.”
Emelina stopped to take a breath. “Em, just slow down. Who are you afraid of ~ Samuel or yourself? You’ve never had a problem talking with him before.” Dez had put her arm around her sister, took the notebook from her and literally slowed the two of them down. “We’re practically running!”
Emelina had slowed down then. She took the notebook from Dez, folded it and put it in her pocket. “I think, Dez, it’s me. Michael was always so good at this employer/employee thing. Never flinched, everyone loved him. I just feel like a misfit.” She linked her arm through her sister’s and was quiet. “You’re still learning, Em. It’s good that you have Michael’s example. Everyone loves you too, Em.” There were times when Dez felt like the older sister, but it usually wasn’t long before the tables were turned.
~~~~~
“Thank you, Samuel. I’m glad you’re happy out here.” Almost stiffly, Em shook hands with Samuel, knowing a hug would not have been appropriate. Hugs were not something Emelina was used to giving, but she was so very relieved. “I’ll be sure to ask Digby to order those tools that need replacing. If you need anything else, just let Digby know.”
~~~~~
“Doubt, of whatever kind, can be ended by action alone.”
~ Thomas Carlyle
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