Safety in the Heat

I love being outside with the morning sun 

on the other side of the building letting me take my 

breakfast and my writing onto my shady balcony.

The forecast tells me the sun will be turning up 

the temperature throughout the day. In the morning 

I am safe and happy. Safety is a big deal for me and 

in the afternoon heat, safety is best kept indoors. 

Except I was restless. Walking somewhere, anywhere, is my treat; my absolute joy. In the afternoon, do I stay indoors or do I crazily brave the wilting flowers, the melting pavement, the hot cement under my feet and hope the wind is cool enough? On a good day, I’d be off to the grocery store, the pet store, the hair dresser, or just a walk at the lake. But today, despite a clear blue sky, despite a wind that may or may not be friendly, is not a good day. 

I draw the line at being told I can't go for a walk ~ it's too dangerous, you know, with the heat and your epilepsy. But I've been stable for a couple of decades now; merely faint stirrings in some mornings. No tsunami of seizure activity. But I know to hesitate, to breathe and to make a plan before getting all stubborn and taking a bus to the store. Sure I get my walks in, but at what price? Excessive heat + bossy epilepsy can mean the tsunami wall can get knocked down. And believe you me, the heat today is excessive. So I made a plan: test it out by going for a walk around the block. My test results? Too hot for anything more than around the block! No seizure activity, but my thinking got a little wonky until I cooled off. 

(I did nip into the gas station for a small carton of ice cream before taking my perspiring self into the cool.)

“Epilepsy is something nobody knows much about. It’s just a 

part of me, part of my head, part of what’s happening 

in there. Sometimes something in my brain triggers it off.”

~ Neil Young, musician