Review, Revision, Edit and Update
A writing coach I once worked with briefly, asked me this question: “Are you invested in your own words?” At the time, my immediate response was - No. I assumed this was the expected response. Over time, I have realized that, in general, I really am not particularly invested in my own words. It is the clarity and meaning behind my words that I seek. However, over the past 150 revisions, I have recognized both the apparent desire to keep certain words or phrases as well as well as my willingness to dispense of them.
This episode did change some previously desired word choices. I didn't notice any major changes that would improve this kitchen conversation.
Of the Moment
Emelina, distracted by her sister’s voice, said “What’s exactly 150 days, Dez?”
“You know, Emmie, the day I turned to crime. You and I were still in different worlds. I was just barely paying my bills and you were in your Ivory Tower, letting everyone take care of you. I went to work everyday, sometimes more than one job. You went to Charity functions when you weren’t at home in bed. 150 days ago is when I tried to take some of that lovely money just lying on Miss Prudhomme’s desk.”
“We were in different worlds, weren’t we? I had almost forgotten. Why did we ever let go of each other?” Dez and Emmie were in the Estate kitchen, helping Cook. They were peeling and coring apples, getting them ready for freezing and some for a large pot of apple sauce. Cook was busy cleaning and slicing mounds of carrots, also for the freezer. “Miss Dez, I had no idea that I shouldn’t trust you too close to the family silver.” Cook didn’t know whether to laugh or be frightened, but when she saw the look of amusement on their faces, she knew there had been some fun. “Oh, go on with you two. Did you get any of the money, Miss Dez? If you did maybe I should be getting you to pay for the extra food you get out here.” Cook was laughing now. “So why did you let go of each other? You both seem pretty close now.”
“Cook, I’ve forgotten if there ever was a single incident or if we just stopped calling each other.” Dez put down the apple she was peeling and looked up at the ceiling. Then she went back to work, saying “And by the time we were both on our own, our lives were pretty different. I thought Emmie was stuck up and a bit holier than thou and…..” Emmie interrupted. “And I thought you were irresponsible and didn’t care about the finer things. Really, if it hadn’t been for that police officer calling me in the middle of the night, we may never have found each other. If this pandemic was good for anything, it forced us to live together again. I was all alone in what you called my Ivory Tower, and you were all alone with only the police telling you what you had to do.”
“Are there any more apples, Cook or are we done?” Emelina picked up the big basin of apple peels and took it to the compost bucket. “You girls have done enough, and I thank you. I’ll finish packaging the apples and get them in the freezer. Go ahead and wash up. What are you two getting up to now?”
~~~~~
“Cook said that we seem pretty close now.” Emmie and Dez had gone upstairs. Emmie, to tidy her room, still in disarray from the night Jeremy called her to go to the hospital; Dez, to re-pack her backpack. She was returning to her own apartment that afternoon. “Those two weeks together, just the two of us, here in this big old house was our opportunity. Good thing we took it.” Dez was hesitant to leave her sister, but her employer Mr. Jorgensson, needed her for a couple of day shifts. Emmie called out to her “Dez, look at this.” She was walking from her room with an old photo album. “Look at these pictures - you must have been 12 and I would have been 14. We were close then. We looked so happy.” Emelina was tearing up. Her sister had a flash of thought. “When do you think we really stopped being sisters, Em? When did you start dating Michael? I never really did like him but you were all gaga over him.” Her big sister closed the old album. “No, I was not. He was just good looking, two years older than me and his parents were rich. He had his own car. He was just, well, convenient and it was logical. I was the most popular girl in the school and he was the most popular and very cool guy.” She held the album to her like it was one of her school books. Dez laughed “See! You’re still gaga over him.”
Emmie’s face fell, she sat down in the living room and put the photo album on the coffee table. “We did break up when he went off to university. But I guess you’re right. I never did get over him and I probably never will. He never knew we had a child. Dez, will I ever find out if Carrie is that child?” Silence filled the room. Carefully and calmly, Dez set her backpack at the head of the stairs. “I don’t know, Em. No one but Carrie can let us in on those adoption papers and she'll have to be well before she can do that. Can you just be her friend while we wait, or will that be too much, Em?”
“Oh, Dez. How can it be too much? It’s only when I go back to those years that I worry about my teenage self. If I keep myself grounded in the here and now, I’m able to see Carrie as someone who just needs to have someone out here. Some kind of hope to hang on to. Working at the shelter showed me just how much a little bit of hope can help. So I’ll just write my letters - today it will be about the trees down by the water and peeling apples.”
“It’s funny how humans can wrap their mind around things
and fit them into their version of reality,”
~ Rick Riordan, The Lightning Thief
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