Be Patient!

To calm my itchy fingers I planted a few knobs of sprouting ginger root, with little glass pebbles on the surface to catch the light. Shopping today, I just about brought home some little burlap bags with tomato seeds already planted. It is still only February!! Slow down, step away from the planting. But the sun was so beautiful today, ice melting, sidewalks and streets clearing. But just this one little pot? Pleeeease.

“February is the border between winter and spring.”

~ Terri Guillemets, Years

Little Lost 'C'

 

Completely missed by all

unless

readers have been kind.

February Theme Come Early

was empty

t’wards the tail end of the word!

Confidence has two c’s, 

always,

until I misspelled it to read

CONFIDENE - the missing C

gone

and remembered today!

“Anyone who can only think of one way to 

spell a word obviously lacks imagination.”

~ Mark Twain

Monsters, Dragons and Dandelions

Entering into the garden of imagination 

is a fearsome adventure. Who knows what monsters or dragons lurk within?

Clearing a way through 

all this tangled mass to find and 

nurture poetry or story

my spirit is challenged to try again 

~ monsters become stubborn thistles 

and precious dandelions,

dragons merely songbirds, squirrels and mice

making their nests and burrows 

~ inviting me to dinner. 

“Where there is a monster, there is a miracle.”

~ Ogden Nash

Chapter Two, Episode 122 - Stepping Out - Situationally Theirs

Stepping Out 

Needing something to settle the tremors in his stomach, Matt asked for a glass of water. “Are you ok, Matt? You look so pale!” He had been fine before Dez opened the door. But when he saw her, her face clean and beautiful, he felt like he’d been punched. “I’m ok, just a little thirsty. Pretty hungry too.” Dez wasn’t sure she believed him, but had no choice but accept what he said. “Well then, I guess we’d better get going. Where are we going? You said something about a new place that’s opened in the city.”

Matt swallowed hard. “I’m not sure you’ll like it but I’ve heard their steaks are dynamite. And they have local musicians.” He had reserved their table and asked for something private or even a booth. “It’s a country and western grill, Dez. I know you and your sister like the symphony and other kinds of music, but I wanted to try this place out with you.” Holding his breath, he watched her face. “C&W! You’re kidding! Do you dance?” His stomach eased a bit to see her light up with excitement. He still had the evening ahead of him. “Sure I do. I like line dances and doing the country swing, anything. Haven’t been out dancing for a long, long time.” 

“Just a minute. I need to get something different to wear. I’ll be right back.” She was gone and back in a flash. “How do you like it?” She spun around like a school girl to show off the denim jacket. It was decorated with cacti and cactus flours in green, yellow and soft orange sequins. “I got this jacket years ago. I had travelled to New Mexico and brought this back with me. I never thought I’d wear it again. But tonight is perfect.” The words almost stuck in his throat. “It’s..it's nice. Looks good on you.” 

~~~~~

It was like stepping into another country. A big open room, with authentic old barn wood paneling, was finished with cow skulls, tack and lariats, paintings of fields of wheat, cattle grazing and old red barns. Hay bales were positioned around the bandstand, some on the edges of the dance floor. Dez and Matt were seated at a table in one corner, by the front window. The band was playing many of the country classics that Dez recognized. Merle Haggard, Tammy Wynette, Willie Nelson. She relaxed for the first time since the beginning of the pandemic. Em would not have been comfortable here. “Thanks for bringing me here, Matt. I’ve been so caught up in my sister’s life that I forgot this other life out here.”

“So you really do like it here?” Matt hadn’t quite believed her excitement, relaxed a bit more. “Dez, here’s your food.” She looked up at the waiter with two big platters of steak and fries. “Wow! I don’t know if I can eat all that, Matt. There was a time when it wouldn’t have been enough. Would you be embarrassed if I can’t eat it all and take the rest home?” He just grinned. “Of course not, as long as you don’t mind it I do the same! We should have shared one order - but then people would talk about the old folks.” She laughed. “We’re not that old, Matt. Besides you’re older than me. And very mature.”

~~~~~

Lights had been turned low. Having eaten their fill, they asked for take away boxes. The waiter cleared their dishes away. Matt’s stomach was tightening again. This time he couldn’t say it was from hunger. He reached in his pocket, then thought better of it. “They’re playing our song, Dez. Come dance with me.” He stood and took her hand. She looked at him longingly. Not saying a word she stood close to him. As though they’d been dancing for years, they glided onto the floor to the gentle country swing. Dancing close, her hair tickled his nose. She nestled into his arms. “Matt - we don’t have a song. Do you even know this one?” She tipped her head back to see him watching her. “Well, we could pick this one. I’ll find out what it is and who plays it.” The music had stopped leaving them alone on the floor. “Come on, we’re being stared at.” Back at the table he waited for her to sit down. He got down on one knee. “Matt what are you doing? They’ve got janitors to pick things up off the floor! Or did you drop something?” He just looked up at her. “No, I found this in my pocket.” Awkwardly he handed her a little velvet box. “What’s this, Matt? What’s going on?” Now it was Dez’s turn to be nervous. She opened the little box. A simple gold band. She just stared at it. “Dez. …..Dez…..can we get married?” He hesitated. “Damn. That came out wrong……” He tried again. “Do you want to marry me?” He disappointed himself again. Big tears slid down Dez’s cheeks. “Of course I want to marry you, you crazy guy,” The room had gone quiet when people saw this 50 something man get down on one knee. Now it erupted in applause and the band struck up a wedding song.

“No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anybody but oneself.”

~ Virginia Woolf

Spit Spot!

Everyday chores do not inspire confidence until the job is done, chaos is gentled and order restored. 

Taught how to sweep the floor, wash the dishes and make the beds, children rail against everyday chores caught in the joy of play.

Adults mayn’t grow to love 

everyday chores piled up 

but without Mary Poppins ~ 

let go or gentle the chaos.

“The cleaning is something I use as a reward if I get some work done.

 I go into a very happy state of mind when I’m vacuuming.”

~ Joyce Carol Oates

Look

Depth was a quality 

hidden within reflection, 

to answer questions

and pose new ones ~

sharing life’s meaning.

“It is not the length of life, but the depth of life.”

~ RalphWaldo Emerson

Back in Time

Back in Time

Intimacy came slowly to the young couple. So slowly, that neither were prepared for the day they met again. Childhood sweethearts, they had not considered their futures. Five year olds seldom do. Elementary school passed and when high school came separation was inevitable. She got involved with drama and the arts. He got involved in every sports team he could. Dreams were longer shared. They still looked at each other wistfully, but there was nothing more. She went to a university across the country. He was a first pick for a major league hockey team. She married a man in one of her drama classes. A family of five and acting kept her busy and happy. Camping trips to the mountains with their children were special times for them. In the city, they introduced their children to museums and art galleries. When he passed too early, leaving her with children to raise, she felt his loss like a knife in her heart. They had loved each other dearly. The hockey star also married and had a wonderful family. His wife made his career and their family her priority. A stay at home mom, she was also a hockey mom. Because her husband was away so much of the time, their cell phones and iPads were invaluable. Between games, wherever he was, there would be a home game video to watch and many times, he watched the games from a distance but with his family. They would each order up nachos and share that time with each other. When he closed his eyes at night he was proud and happy of his wife and children. His heart ached that he had to be so far away so often.

~~~~~

An invitation in the mail to Melanie’s hometown 150th anniversary came in the mail. She set it aside while she looked at the flyers from toy stores and big box stores. She sighed. “This is where my life has ended? Looking at flyers and wondering if I should go home for the anniversary.” She shook her head. Talking to her parrot while he preened his feathers, she said. “I haven’t been in touch with anyone from there in years. We’re all old and probably wouldn’t recognize anyone anyway.” Her children had married and lived in different parts of the country. They had their own families to care for. She saw her grandchildren regularly on Skype, always on their birthdays and took trips to see them. Her acting career had shrivelled to almost nothing. 

Just herself and her parrot. “Enough of feeling sorry for myself.” She picked up the invitation and called the number. “Harry, it’s good to talk to you!……..Yes, I’m coming, just got the invitation today.”

~~~~~

Harry returned to his hometown after his wife’s death the year before. He didn’t know if he’d be happy there, but at least he’d be closer to one of his sons. That had been a surprise. “Why on earth do you want to live out in the sticks, Ben?”  His son was the one to be surprised. “Really, dad? The three of us came out here every summer to grandma and grandpa’s. I have a ton of friends out there. One of the guys and I are opening a sports equipment business out there. We’ll stay connected with the major supplier in the city and will be able to get equipment faster for all the surrounding towns.” Harry didn’t say anything but worried that their eagerness didn’t match reality. But, turned out it did. So Harry moved 'out to the sticks' too. Involved with the town’s 150th anniversary, he was put in charge of researching and sending out the invitations. When he came upon Melanie’s name, his heart did a little flip. “Naw. She won’t even remember me. We were quite a pair when we were five, but that was a long time ago.” He addressed it and put it in the mail with all the others.

~~~~~

“Before we belonged to anyone else, we were each other’s.”

~ Elizabeth Noble, The Way We Were