Natural Expecations - Earth Day 2015

I flipped the switch for my lights - and expected light to flood the room

I opened my fridge - and expected food to be cold.

I plugged in my computer -and expected the screen to light up…...

I twisted the dial on my washer and dryer - my clothes came out clean and dry

I plugged the iron in to heat and pressed my clothes flat

I turned on my toothbrush and scrubbed my teeth clean……...

Universal water, wind and sunlight with man’s ingenuity, 

provide our many conveniences.

Logic says that we need conserve and protect 

 ~ our sources of energy, 

 ~ our use of energy.

“Humankind has not woven the web of life. 

We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together….all things connect.”

~ Chief Seattle

Small Expectations

This lovely flowered city of Victoria, at the south end of Vancouver Island, is expected to have flowers blooming from gardens, trees and trellises. As for the trees, their flowers are to be wonderful great clouds of pink or white sending ‘snow’ to cover sidewalks, cars and streets. Streets lined with frothy lace in spring. 

But this little bouquet, forgot to follow the rules ~ a timid yet brave child peeking out from the protection of a tall stalwart parent hoping that no one would notice.

“It’s hard to be brave when you’re only a Very Small Animal.”

~ A.A.Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

Fragile Expectations

Tiny bells cling to this fragile stem of life.

For each of us with epilepsy ~ with any invisible disease ~ expecting support and kindness that will allow us to grow is reasonable ~

from outside of us when we are too fragile to stand on our own.

from inside of us as we build our strengths.

Sometimes we do not ask ~ or do not know to ask ~ for support or kindness.

Our need is not always recognizable ~
the fragile stem of life breaks without warning.

I am so very grateful to all who have played a part in my life.

“I think about how fragile people are, how anyone 

can disappear in a second and be gone forever.”

~ Matthew Quick, Boy21

Burning Expectations

My expectations of nurses are, many times, impossibly high. I know that young women and men go into the nursing profession to help. To care for those wh are ill.  I recall my step-father-in-law so very surprised when I was spoke of a patient who was rude to me and to other nurses. He was actually quite shocked. Today I am shocked when I hear of nurses injured and on sick leave because of this behaviour and worse. Do I put responsibility on the nurses for their responses to such behaviour? If their responses are inappropriate or impolite, the responsibility belongs to the nurse, including myself.

But what I have learned over the years is about the condition of burn out when people are under the stresses and strains of whatever life has to offer. This includes impoverished work situations with limited resources.

But, do I put full responsibiity on the patients? I certainly could, and probably have. There are some folks out there that have, shall we say, poor social skills whether sick or well, intoxicated or sober. In fact the behaviour can become worse when sickness prevails.

Do I put full responsibility on the health care systems? Well, kind of. I do give the system their fair share of responsibility, which is a fairly large chunk. Nurses, and other health care professionals and workers are asked to work with minimal resources and in tight time frames. 

I could continue with this ‘blame game’ - or more politely - responsibility. However, I would have to speak about political redirection of funds from the health care systems, and then health care systems redirection of funds to things that I only hear about in the rumour mill.

Systems are composed of people - individuals who have come to their positions with education, upbringings and ideals. Systems are dynamic and ever changing. The pressure of trying to keep a system up and running efficiently is another reason for professional burnout. Shifting and morphing as nurses, doctors, administrators and the myriad of workers come and go.

I guess I have impossibly high expectations of all those folks too. 

“We all participate in weaving the social fabric; 

we should therefore all participate in patching 

the fabric when it develops holes ~ mismatches 

between old expectations and current realities." 

~ Anne C. Weisberg, 

Everything a Working Mother Needs to Know, 1994

Expecting

Expecting 

Richard gazed lovingly at his newborn daughter. Only an hour old, she had already wrapped him up in so much baby love that nothing else existed. 

"Richard? Are you all right? You’re crying. You never cry."

Daphne smiled at her husband holding their first child with great gentleness. It was a tender moment for her. He had spent so much time telling everyone what a tough dad he was going to be. He wasn’t going to melt like half his buddies did with their new babies. It was just plain silly. And there he was with silver tracings on his unshaven face.

Slowly his wife’s face came into focus. She was pale and tired, but radiated peace. He had watched her all these past months as she carried their child within her. So much had changed. The room that had seemed so practical, now was softened by shifting nameless emotions.

‘Yes, honey, I am. I am more all right now than even the day I knew that I loved you. This darling, tiny baby came into the world with absolutely no expectations. She dashed all my silly blowhard ravings of how a father should be as if by magic. And she is only tiny and wrinkled and very sleepy.’

As if on cue, little Rachel yawned and squeaked before falling back to sleep.

“Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.”

~ A.A.Milne, Winnie the Pooh

Thoughts for a Friend

Each heart holds it’s own beauty ~

tendrils that come from the soul.

Bring into your home that precious part of you without

the otherness of expectations for image, knowledge and poise ~

for a home filled with sanctity, security and peace.

“Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars 

and see yourself running with them.”

~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

Great Expectations

Here are two pictures, both of them a finished crocheted project. Of course the one in book was made, I am certain, by someone who had been crocheting for years and very expertly.  The other, of which I am very proud, is the same pattern, done about 20 years ago for a colleague and her new baby. Until then I had not used patterns, so it was like reading a different language. With the advent of a new baby for friends, I decided to do another because the first one was so pretty.

I have been working for several hours in the last two days on the blanket and have only the very center completed - the very first row (a bit bigger than the size of a quarter). My great expectation was that long term memory would suffice to allow me to just get the yarn, the hook and the pattern and just crochet to my heart’s content. Not so! I guess 20 years isn’t long term enough for memory.

But, I am persistent, stubborn and know I can do this!  My expectations of myself and my ability to learn continue to run high!

“Expectation wasn’t just about what people expected of you. 

It was about what you expected of yourself.”

~ Brandon Sanderson, Words of Radiance