Solitude ~ 3

Solitude sounds are soft,

 masked only by the 

  noise in our minds.

“The atmosphere defines the environment of sound.”

~ Bill Laswell, bassist

Out of the City - A Birthday Party Treat

Qu'Appelle Valley
(Photo from Sept 21, 2016)

I don’t get out of the city very often. When I do, driving past harvested wheat fields, hay fields with giant rolled bales of hay and through autumn coloured hills open my heart to the land. However, the real treat was our destination.

With a good friend, we were attending a birthday party for a two year old boy. Family, friends, ice cream birthday cake, laughter, balloons and mounds of gifts filled the small living room. It was a noisy, lovely afternoon. Only solitude was in short supply.

“A society should be judged by how it treats its children.”

~ Owen Jones

On an Afternoon Walk ~ Flamboyant!

When leaves on the trees and on plants are crumbling and fading, my colours are still brilliant. 

I do like to show off! 

I know it will soon be my turn to fade, but until then I’ll just bask in the ooh and aah of passersby.

“Although I behave in a quite reserved way in my personal life, 

give me a stage and I’ll be as flamboyant as I can.”

~ Danny Boyle

On an Afternoon Walk - A Song for All Seasons

I have a ceramic story tree on my desk. J.R.R.Tolkein wrote of Treebeard, the oldest of the Ents, in Lord of the Rings. J.K.Rowling wrote of the Whomping Willow in Harry Potter. On the farm, I’d go in the grass between stunted prairie trees to read. In Victoria, B.C. the gnarled old Garry Oaks enchanted me and reminded me of our arching elms here in Regina. The swaths of pine and fir on the mountain sides are mysterious and mystical. 

To add some music to these forested memories, this 'singing tree' greets me on my walks to the grocery store. In spring, it welcomes sprouting branches, in summer displays these wonderful green leaves, in autumn bejewelled in yellow, orange and red and in winter wears a beard of snow. My friend is always changing and forever unchanged.

“Trees are the poems that the earth writes upon the sky.”

~ Kahlil Gibran, Sand and Foam

Chapter Two, Episode 155 - Safe Zone - Situationally Theirs

“Really, Em! You can’t do that. You know nothing about farming. You barely know anything about how to run Michael’s estate or you wouldn’t be running out of money.” Emelina was stunned. Jeremy had never spoken to her like that before. If he was in a bad mood or tired from a bad shift, he might be a big snappy. He had always supported whatever she wanted to do until now. “I think I’d better go, Jeremy. I really thought you would be at least interested.” Putting her coat back on, she turned to leave. “I’ll be out at the Estate. If you want to know more about my new endeavour, you’ll know where to find me.” Her hand on the door, she turned back to him. “We can’t keep on like this. Every time I come in there is something bothering you. You won’t talk about it.” She looked at him, still wet from his shower, and sighed. “When you’re ready to talk….” She left their apartment, closed the door, stood still a moment before she went to the elevator. Whispering to herself she said “What will I tell the others?” Straightening her shoulders, she dried her eyes. 

~~~~~

It was Jeremy’s turn to be stunned. No one had ever walked out on him without slamming a door. “Tone of voice, Jeremy.” That’s what his grandfather would have said without interrupting whatever he’d been doing. He also knew that his wife could and would do anything she set her mind to since the pandemic. And he let her go out the door. He was tired of apologizing for his bad temper. This time he had just been mean, even after seeing the sparkle in her eyes when she started telling him the plans she and Dez had. “What the hell is wrong with me?! All I wanted was one evening without someone shouting at me to fix someone, write orders, speak to a family, do this, do that.” Standing in the middle of the open apartment, its emptiness frightened him. Water dribbled from his hair, he shivered and pulled his bathrobe tight. 

~~~~~

Em knew her husband was right. She didn’t know anything about farming and she barely knew how to run the Estate. She drove out of the city and turned onto the highway towards home. That didn’t mean she couldn’t learn, and he did know that. At first she had felt beaten down and wrong. Now she was angry. What right did he have to assume that she hadn’t given the farm a lot of thought. And where was he when she wanted to discuss it days ago! Sure he was a doctor and worked in a hospital. She’d heard all the sob stories about lousy shifts, other doctors mistakes, poor report from nurses but that didn’t give him the right to treat her like she was one of them. As she settled into the short drive home, her anger softened. She’d need to talk with Dez about it. Maybe tonight. Maybe she’d keep it all to herself and just go home to bed.

~~~~~

Dez could see headlights, the car was turning down the lane. “Wonder who that could be? Matt’s gone to his orchard, Martha and James are home having supper, Samuel’s still working in the garden and Cook has gone to get him for their supper, Em’s gone in to spend a couple of nights with Jeremy. But that looks like the vehicle Em took…….it is Em!” Her sister’s lights shone on Dez where she was sorting out where a Farmgate Stand could be. She pulled to the side of the lane, put it in park took her hands off the wheel. White knuckles, her hands sore, she stretched her fingers out. Dez knocked on the window, worried when she saw her sister’s red, wet face. “Em. Open the door! What’s wrong! Is it Jeremy? Is he hurt? Why are you back so soon?” Em did open the door and practically tumbled into her sister's arms. Sobbing, she just let her sister hold her. Dez glanced in both directions for any other vehicles coming. “Let’s get you sitting down, Em. Here, we’ve put a bench here where we think the Stand might be. Do you want to go home?” All her sister could do was shake her head. “But we can’t stay out here, it’s almost dark as it is and it’s pretty damp tonight. Why don’t I take you to my place and get you some hot tea. You can stay with me tonight. You don’t have to talk about any of it until you’re ready. Just let me know that Jeremy is ok.” Em nodded her head. Her voice low she said ‘He’s all right. I just don’t want to see him right now.” Dez had no idea what was going on, but she did know her sister needed her help. “Ok, come back to your car. I’ll drive and get you to my place.” Her sister looked up at her “Please don’t tell anybody any of this. It’s probably just me. Maybe he’ll come out and apologize.” She gave Dez her cell phone. “If he calls don’t answer it. If he calls your phone, just let him know I’m ok, if he wants to know.”

~~~~~

Jeremy had no close family or friends. His friends were the doctors and nurses he worked with but only at work. He didn’t know any of them outside work. Could he call James? Never. That would be crossing some kind of a line. Giles? He hardly knew him at all. Samuel? He wasn’t ready to hear some of his old time-y stories. He definitely couldn’t call Dez, that was really too close to home. Besides that Em would need her sister and he didn’t want to put Dez in the middle. That only left Matt. They were about the same age. Maybe they could meet for coffee. It wasn’t all that late, so he’d give it a try. Satisfied, he found his number and called. After the fourth ring, Matt answered. 

~~~~~

“Every couple needs to argue now and then. Just to prove 

that the relationship is strong enough to survive. 

Long-term relationships, the ones that matter 

are all about weathering the peaks and the valleys.’

~ Nicholas Sparks, Safe Haven

A Meeting of Minds ~ 3

They were having a serious discussion. Two young men coming home from school stopped because of Tommy “It’s a duck. Now let’s go.” Slinging his backpack over his shoulder, he started to walk away. 

“That’s dumb. It’s just a cloud.” Jimmy didn’t believe all that stuff about clouds. His mom was always seeing bunny rabbits or elephants. He couldn’t tell her she was being dumb unless he wanted to get in trouble.

Neither of them wanted any trouble. Tommy always went to his friend’s house after school. His parents didn’t get home from work until supper. His big sister had basketball practice or was just hanging out with her friends. “Mom’s baking day today. Hope you’re hungry.” 

“Sure am. Last one to your house is a rotten egg!!”

“Everything you can imagine is real.”

~ Pablo Picasso

On an Afternoon Walk - On the Street Where We Lived

My afternoon walks always have a purpose. Buying groceries, business at the bank, my regular visit to the dentist’s office, around the lake, maybe a hair appointment, or just to see the seasonal changes but always to see the city at sidewalk level. There was time when a walk was just a walk. I really didn’t like them much because they had no purpose. Many would disagree. Walking for the sake of walking should be enough. Today my purpose was to get cat food at the Vet Clinic, a 30 minute walk away. It’s along the way that my purpose is filled with autumn leaves, warm sun, a bench to sit on with my book, and an ice cream store. 

To get to the Vet Clinic, one street I always walk down is the street where we raised our sons. We were only there for seven years, but I love that street. Many of the houses have been refreshed, an apartment block nestles halfway down the street. Yards are full of plants going dormant and piles of composting leaves tucked over and around tender perennials, the trees are old elms that cover the ground and sidewalk with crisp gold under my feet. My inner child wanted to kick through them but this too mature adult warned of tripping hazards beneath. So I behaved myself and just enjoyed the crunch beneath my steady walk there and back.

“How quick and rushing life can sometimes seem, 

when at the same time it’s so slow and sweet and everlasting,”

~ Graham Swift, Tomorrow

On an Afternoon Walk ~ A Short Story

A Short Story 

To walk in solitude past the sleeping geese gave Delilah rest. A long day’s work staring at a computer screen had taxed her mind, not to mention her eyes. Column after column of numbers blurred by days end. She was jealous of the sleeping geese, ignorant of anyone passing them. It was silly, but she felt like tiptoeing past them. Instead she found her special bench and sat. Feeling like she should keep walking but enjoying the fall colours, Delia breathed a sigh of relief. It was Friday ~ no more computers til Monday. Face to the sun, eyes closed she gloried in the late afternoon.

“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees 

on a summer’s day, listening to the murmur of the water, 

or watching the clouds float across the sky, 

is by no means a waste of time.”

~ John Lubbock, The Use of Life

On an Afternoon Walk ~ Hidden History

Glassed in surrounds 

bricks and mortar curlicues

technology stands guard.

“When we build, let us think that we build forever.”

~ John Ruskin

On an Early Evening Walk - A Family Walk

A four year old on a scooter 

    ~ wheels with coloured lights 

A one year old in a stroller 

    ~ great grandma at the helm.

Mom and dad holding hands 

    with grandpa at their side

A stop to ride the swings 

    ~ and slide the slide

Clear sky, no wind, setting sun 

    ~ walkin’ off a delicious meal and the energy of children.

“Being a family means you are part of something very wonderful. 

It means you will love and be loved for the rest of your life.”

~ Lisa Weedn, designer and artist

On an Afternoon Walk - Brilliance

Surrounded by greenery

 leaves of late summer 

 display their brilliance

“It is the glistening autumnal side of summer.”

~ Henry David Thoreau

Book Review: The Pull of the Stars by Emma Donoghue

Nurse Julia Powers, just shy of 30 years old, lived with her younger brother who is damaged by the war. A trained obstetric nurse, she took a tram partway through rain soaked Dublin; unlocked her bicycle and rode the streets to the hospital. In 1918, dark, crowded and bleak, the Influenza Pandemic raged; people literally dying in the streets. Suddenly she was nurse in charge of a cramped three cot Maternity/Fever ward, a converted supply room. The usual charge nurse had taken ill with Influenza. Long shifts, only one nurse to relieve the next shift. Physicians in short supply. Bridie Sweeney, the only help that Nurse Julia was given, came from a ‘home’ run by an order of Roman Catholic nuns.

Throughout three days, Emma Donoghue describes scenes of child birth that horrified me. Poverty and malnutrition made birthing tragic and the effects of influenza compounded it. Julia Powers’ commitment to her patients pushed it all aside. She had to instruct Bridie Sweeney on the fly. Bridie was bright, attentive and willing to do whatever was necessary. Patient care, getting bandages or instruments, mopping the floor, running for a physician, carrying messages, and when there was time was getting food. Julia, with a doctor’s verbal orders, gave out ‘chloral’, whiskey and morphine. For a patient that refused all sedatives, she was given warm lemonade and aspirin.  Julia made linseed poultices or used camphor to ease chests. One still birth, one baby born healthy, one baby born with a cleft palate. One mother died leaving her child motherless. The births were anything but easy. We can be very grateful for the times we live in.

One character in The Pull of the Stars was Dr. Kathleen Lynn, an obstetrician. This character is the only character in this novel that is historically real. The authors note tells the reader that she was vice president of the Sinn Féin executive and its director of public health. Although arrested, the mayor of Dublin freed her to work combatting the flu. There is more in the authors note about her history.

What an amazing read! And so well timed. This weekend I attended my nursing class reunion and thought of all the brave and dedicated nurses through years. I purchased this book because I’ve read others by Emma Donoghue. I had also heard an interview with her on CBC by Elinor Wachtel, so when I saw The Pull of the Stars at the local bookshop, I purchased it without knowing much about the story at all. I’m glad I took a chance on it.

“Nursing was like being under a spell: you went in very young 

and came out older than any span of years could make you.”

~ Emma Donoghue, The Pull of the Stars

Title: The Pull of the Stars

Author: Emma Donoghue

Copyright: 2020

Publisher: Little, Brown and Company, a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

Type: Novel

Format: Fiction

ISBN -  978-0-316-49901-9  (hardcover)

ISBN -  978-0-316- 70529 -5  (large print)

LCCN - 2020935462

From Class Reunion to Alumnae Luncheon

We weren’t finished. Our class reunion was, but today the Regina General Hospital School of Nursing annual gathering met for lunch. On hold during the Covid 19 pandemic, this was our first one back: the 44th Annual RGH School of Nursing Luncheon. In past years, it was a Saturday night dinner, then a Sunday brunch and today a Sunday luncheon). Two hundred and twenty one nurses sat down to a delicious meal in the Ballroom at the Doubletree Hotel. It was not an easy task to get us all seated and quiet for introductions! Herding cats comes to mind. 

From the classes of 1949 to 1953 all the way to the last classes in 1972, we were an amazing gathering! Several of our classes celebrated reunions or caught up on reunions missed due to Covid 19. Today we lunched with nurses we learned from and worked with; looking for our ‘big sisters’, instructors and colleagues. ‘Big sisters’ were from the year previous to teach us the ropes of the Nurses Residence we lived in. Many of us had no clue who our big sisters were!! Some were able to reconnect with a big sister. Not all had maintained that relationship when life and circumstance interfered.

It was a great weekend. In five years, the RGH Nursing class of 1968 will meet again - location to be determined. In one year, the RGH School of Nursing will meet for a Sunday luncheon, or brunch - that’s to be determined as well.

Thanks go to the Doubletree by Hilton Hotel staff for a comfortable well run weekend for us all.

“……the hours are long, the work hard, and the pay inadequate to the 

amount of concentrated energy required. A nurse, now does not view 

her profession dispassionately. It is too much a part of her.”

~ Monica Dickens

55 Year Reunion ~ A Story Space

Tiny nurses caps made by
one of our classmates

A really vibrant story space! We were and still are so fortunate to have been one of the 'three year classes’ to share a residence; to learn our craft; to work together and best of all to share our nursing fears and woes with each other as we learned. This weekend we have come back together to rehash so much of the past, the years in-between and being present with one another again. Tonight we shared a fine dining experience that would have been impossible on the pittance we received in training. To top the evening off our maitre de asked us for a song he had been told we all knew. Poor man blushed when we sang the whole song beginning with “We are the General girls, we wear our hair in curls…….” The ending is not particularly polite ~ not bawdy, just not polite in today’s world. A bit of stumbling over the second verse, but we did remember it as children remember nursery rhymes.

“I have never had a problem or worry, either big or small, that couldn’t be 

made better by meeting with a girlfriend and talking about it over coffee.”

~Tilda Shalof, The Making of a Nurse

Reunion Fellowship

Regina General Hospital to the right
Nurses Residence at the back

Faces unchanged but still the same ~

conversation flowed like pebbles along a shore telling of

exploits and experience wrapped in the warmth of fellowship

while photos and yearbooks examined for classmates we miss, memories of rigid or kind instructors, student pranks and residence life.

At the buffet line, the bubbling chatter merely slowed.

“We all take different paths in life but no matter where we go, 

we take a little of each other everywhere.”

~ Tim McGraw

Where Nurses Come From

Nursing is not a solitary task. We must find a place of solitude when creating relationship with our patients, while remembering the demands and exceptions of the outside world. Before the work and soul of nursing, we were girls and young women. In nursing education before the 1970’s in Saskatchewan, we entered a three year diploma program. We lived 300 strong in a Nurses Residence, rooming with a stranger following the same path. We learned about physicians and the power they held, and had to learn our own place in health care. We learned about medicines and surgeries, wheelchairs and dietary restrictions. We wore starched uniforms and caps; black stockings in First Year and white stockings after successful completion of that first terrifying, exciting First Year. The shoes! Very sturdy and boring. Definitely not dancing shoes, but serviceable. Our white, starched and very annoying, caps: no band in First Year or Second Year; a blue band in Third year. Many of the procedures and equipment are pieces of history now. What is the same is that sick and injured people need the care that nurses give 24/7, no matter the staffing shortages, pandemics, or tragedies. 

Most, if not all, of our class of 1968 have retired; we have lost too many over the years to the illnesses we have all cared for. Some of these young girls, now older women, are gathering this weekend for our 55th Class Reunion. Those lost to us will be sadly missed. Those not attending due to distance or circumstance will also be missed. Yearbooks and mementos always bring forth memories to compete with good food, many tears and a lot of laughter. 

“Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse.”

~ Elizabeth Kenny

Chapter Two, Episode 153 - Joining Forces - Situationally Theirs

Dez and Matt had hired pickers this year for both apple crops. Matt hired the transient pickers every year, most of the time the same family came through. A husband and wife team were the first to the orchard to get organized and started. Then there was two men from the mainland, who came to the Island for their working holiday every summer. After that there were different people that drifted from orchard to orchard on their way to somewhere. Dez and Em had talked about the finances that were stretched on the Estate. Most of the reason were the increase in taxes that were draining the funds available to Emelina. Dez and Matt had put their heads together and decided to join forces for the apple crops. He delivered to B.C. Fruits every year and had asked Dez if her sister was aware of that avenue. Anything he could, he donated to the Food Bank or a shelter; whoever was in need. 

For now, the pickers were to be housed in the trailers and bunkhouses that Matt had on his property. They had just finished work for the day at the Estate and had returned to their home base on Matt’s farm. Dez and Matt were leaving the orchard when they saw Samuel come from the kitchen looking downcast. Matt called out to him “Skies finally cleared, Samuel! You going home?” Samuel, lost in thought, almost didn’t hear his friend. “Nope. Thought I just stay out here in the cool. Just met with Miss Em and James. They were talking about money things. I needed to come out where I can breathe. You and Miss Dez? Finished for the day?” He wasn’t really wanting any company, but couldn’t refuse this couple. “Yeah, we finished up. Did you see our pickers today? It was their first day here. I think they did a pretty fair job.” When the two men started talking, Dez just backed off. “I’m going up to the house and ask Em what she knows about B.C.Fruits. You two talk what you like to talk about.” She chuckled. “The land and growing things.”

~~~~~

“Hi Cook, isn’t it time for you to be finished up?” Elizabeth was getting her kitchen tidied up. “I’m a little late tonight. James and your sister just finished up a meeting, Martha’s around here some place. Probably still in her office. It’s felt pretty busy this evening. Have you had supper?”

Emelina and James came out of his office, still talking quietly. “Don’t you worry Miss Emelina. We’ll figure something out to keep this old place going and keep the tax man happy.” He locked his office door, turned and saw Dez. “Here’s your sister Miss Em. You talk to her about your worries.” Emelina looked at him, a question on her face. “You know. Sister talk…not that I know much about that.” He laughed and almost patted her on the shoulder. It was not something that James Digby, the butler, would do, no matter how much affection he felt for his employer. 

Martha appeared from her office, sweater on, ready to leave for the day; Elizabeth turned off the light over the stove, also ready for home and quiet. “James, good. You’re ready to go. We can walk home together. It’s still light enough for Elizabeth to get to her place. Too bad Samuel has already left, he could have seen her home.” Dez interrupted. “Oh, he’s still out there and with Matt. They’re talking farming and orchards, probably in the same place I left them.” Dez walked to the back door with them. “I’ll turn off the lights when I go. I’m going to stay here for a bit and talk with my sister.” 

~~~~~

All the while, Emelina had been quiet. She sat at the table looking quite lost and almost sad. “What is it, Em? Talk to me.” Emelina just looked up at her sister, her eyes a bit too moist. Dez wouldn’t have believed her if she said nothing was wrong. “I have failed Michael, Dez. I’ve failed James and Martha and Cook. I’ve failed you.” Now her cheeks were streaked with wet. Dez grabbed her a tissue from the counter. “What are you talking about!? Failing? You? What on earth did you and James talk about that’s got you so upset?” She waited while her sister sobbed quietly into her tissue. Taking a deep breath, she said “I haven’t managed the money for the Estate and now we’re in trouble.” Dez let out a short sigh, not sure what to say but knew she needed to say something. “Has James talked with the accountant - I don’t remember his name - Gerald something - and the financial advisor. His name is……Green….Ron Green. Has James talked with them?” Emelina looked annoyed. “Of course he has. That what we talked about. We’ve just been going along like the money Michael left me was never ending. But interest rates and the market - all things I don’t know a thing about. I have to trust them to steer me in the right direction. But with things as erratic as they’ve been…….and I'm sorry Dez that I snapped at you.” She stopped and hung her head. “It's ok, Em. I don’t know how much this will help but Matt and I have been talking about selling our fruit. I know it’s not the greatest yet but we’re working with the trees now. They had been left alone for a long time. What do you know about B.C.Fruit? That’s where Matt sells his apples. I’m going there tomorrow to see how we can work with them for selling our apples. Right now, we’ll just sell our apples at the Farmer’s Market. If we make enough to support the orchard, that will take some burden off the Estate.” She wanted to talk more about another idea she had. Selling apples at a sort of Fruit stand on the property, and their honey and any produce from the garden. She thought it best to leave that for later. For now, she just needed to take care of her big sister. “Come on, I’ll get you upstairs where it’s your own space and you can rest. I’ll call Matt and tell him where I’ll be for a while.”

“We don’t even know how strong we are until we 

are forced to bring that hidden strength forward.”

~ Isabel Allende