Taking Care of My Guy

June 2024

There was no choice

It was surgery to fix the little bones

that hadn’t mended

 ~ or ~

I don’t want to think about it

So  - no choice.

~~~~~

No more cats, I said ~ 

until he needed a home

 

A companion since 2020, 

we’ve gotten to know each other. 

We communicate pretty well but 

I still struggle with the feline language

It’s in the eye contact, 

the tone of voice - feline or human

The curl of my guy around my legs

His snuggling up to me as I sleep.

~~~~~

So there was no choice

It was surgery to pin the little bones

that hadn’t mended 

~ or ~

I don’t want to think about it

So  - no choice.

“Each cat is a singular being ~ a pulsing centre of the universe

 ~ with this colour eyes, this length and density of fur, 

this palate of preferences, habit and dispositions. 

Each with his own idiosyncrasies.”

~ David Wood, If a Cat Could Talk

To Risk an Idea

Unique, brilliant ideas seldom burst 

into the world fully formed. They risk 

being trampled by non-believers and nay-sayers those people who insist on the norm, the plain, the safe but on closer inspection, such ideas come from the norm, the plain and the safe ~ just with layered embellishments. Cell phones that once were pencil, paper and party lines; to calculators and individual phones; then to separate computers and telephones; each one embellishments of the past. Speaking of the past there were cave drawings and runners, smoke signalling, carriage mail…..each grew from unique, brilliant ideas of the time, the courage and daring of the human spirit.

“Daring ideas are like chessmen moved forward. 

They may be beaten, but they may start a winning game.”

~ Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Movie Review: Fable Deaf ~ Written and produced by Deaf Crows Collective

I was invited to attend the showing of the short film, Fable Deaf, on May 21, 2024. It was held in a banquet room at the Crave Restaurant on Victoria Avenue. The room was crowded with a mix of deaf and hearing Regina residents. The film was silent, with subtitles and full of action and energy. It was a juxtaposition of past knowledge and present trials. An old library of built only of windows and loose boards was cared for by elderly Hugo (Allard Thomas) who would have been content to read his history books and have a cup of tea. Devi (Fatima Nafisa), a young and happy girl, was trying in vain to repair the window frames of the old library that really was falling apart. To Do Lists were posted everywhere, none of the items checked off. Jaul (Mustafa Alabssi), a curious and then angry young man tried to make Hugo understand his concerns but they fought. In a beautiful bout of magical realism, their anger erupted in a violent storm that almost swept them all away and destroyed the library. Jasper (Oscar Grodeki), a child, was seen at the beginning and throughout the film - a young boy alone and seemingly forgotten. In the end, the generations came together and agreed to work together.

This entire evening was in ASL (American Sign Language) with an expert interpreter for those of us who did not understand or communicate in ASL. Following the film and a brief Q & A, we were treated to an explanation of how the film was made as well as a synopsis of its meaning. The ‘library’ was built at Thom Collegiate. The storm scene was shot in a local back yard in a swimming pool! 

It was an excellent production. If you would like to contact the Deaf Crows to see a trailer of this film, or just to ask questions their website is deafcrowscollective.ca

“I am fourth-generation deaf, which means everyone 

in my immediate family is deaf. So I grew up always having

 100 percent accessibility to language and communication, 

which was wonderful and something so many deaf people don’t have.”

~ Shoshannah Stern, actress

Written and produced by Deaf Crows Collective

Directed by Chrystene Ells

Starring

Mustafa Alabssi as Jaul

Oscar Grodecki as Jasper

Fatima Nafisa as Devi

Allard Thomas as Hugo

Shot on location the John Hopkins Regina Stage, Regina, Sk

Long Distance Calls

September 2014 Qu’Appelle Valley

Fixed to the wall beside the coral painted cupboards, a wooden cabinet sported a black speaker above a dial with numbers and letters, to one side a receiver hung on a silver cradle. 

This odd instrument’s only use: to await the ring of the phone on a party line ~ any of the farmers on the same line could pick up and interrupt important adolescent calls going on too long or the operator could call in an emergency call to one of the homes ~ voices travelled along wires strung across the country where birds could rest. Did they feel the vibration of our voices?

Party lines vanished

Single use phones held sway until

multiple use technology bundled everything into 

colourful cell phones, tablets, laptops and computers

buttons and icons locate a myriad of uses

stubby digits or manicured nails send 

emojis bouncing from here to there

voices and images fly about with the birds 

to vibrate and wave to sun and wind, rain and snow.

“Well informed people know it is impossible to transmit 

the voice over wires. Even if it were, it would be of no practical value.”

~ Boston Post, 1865

strowger-net.telefoniemusem.nl

Reunion Fellowship

Regina General Hospital to the right
Nurses Residence at the back

Faces unchanged but still the same ~

conversation flowed like pebbles along a shore telling of

exploits and experience wrapped in the warmth of fellowship

while photos and yearbooks examined for classmates we miss, memories of rigid or kind instructors, student pranks and residence life.

At the buffet line, the bubbling chatter merely slowed.

“We all take different paths in life but no matter where we go, 

we take a little of each other everywhere.”

~ Tim McGraw

Chapter Two, Episode 145 - Talking the Talk - Situationally Theirs

Talking the Talk

Dez wondered if the leaves in the apple trees could tell her anything. They trembled in the breeze, hung heavy with fruit for the kitchen and apple pies. She and Matt still had not set a date. Matt was usually at his orchard and she at hers. Spring then summer. Apples were ripening. There was no time away for either of them. They tried to help one another out, but had never talked about making any kind of plan. Some days everything worked out, they left for Matt’s farm early, took care of his sprinklers and made sure there had been no branches down if there had been a wind storm. Matt often grumbled about not being home enough to keep an eye on things. He always apologized to Dez. Then it was forgotten a moment later. But today, Dez felt a tug on her heart. He was unhappy with their arrangement and so was she. He was taking on, for her, the management of her orchard when she only wanted to learn from him. 

Before that magic night when he proposed to her, they talked over things. Farming things, family, what a life together would look like. When the real work started and continued as spring rolled into summer, their talks were no longer dreams. It had become hard reality. A cool morning, Dez breathed deeply of the fresh apple aroma and smiled. “Yes, this is what I want and I want Matt beside me. How am I……how are we going to make us happen? We can’t just uproot a whole orchard and put them side by side.” Her shoulders felt heavy. Trying to shrug off the weight, she looked up. The clouds had pushed their way down the island, thicker and deep slate grey tinged with orange from the forest fires on the mainland. She felt tiny spits of rain on her face and pulled the hood of her rain slicker up. 

“Penny for your thoughts!” Matt’s voice, cool as the rain, startled her. She spun around, her hood falling off. “Matt! What are you doing here!?” He grinned and stepped back. “I suppose I could leave, but it’s about to rain so I thought I’d come find you.” Dez reached for him, pulling him towards her. “Don’t you dare. I was just thinking about you, about us. I even asked the trees if they knew anything.” He wrapped his arms around her as the rain started to fall. “Did they tell you anything?” Breathless, Dez couldn’t answer him. In that moment of no work, they kissed as though they had been far away from each other for weeks. Dez finally leaned her head back. “You know we’re getting wet, don’t you?” Matt just nuzzled her neck and whispered. “I hadn’t really noticed it, but if you think we should dry off, we could go to the house. Dez turned inside his arms and started walking home. Hand in hand they went in out of the rain.

~~~~~

“You know we have to work something out.” Wearing one of Matt’s plaid shirts, Dez was up making coffee and getting them something to eat. “We don’t have much in the fridge, should we order pizza?” Matt called from the bathroom. “What did you say? I can’t hear you with this shower running.” Dez was already on the phone ordering pizza and extras.” Matt came out of the bathroom wearing a towel and running a comb through his hair. “Shower’s all yours, honey. Like the shirt!” Dez blushed. “It’s not quite my style but all I could find in a hurry. I’ve ordered the pizza, money’s on the table and the coffee’s just about ready.” Giving him a quick kiss, she disappeared into the bathroom. Matt hurried back to the bedroom to pull his jeans and a T-shirt on. Muttering to himself, he said “Delivery shouldn’t be here that quick but you never know.”

~~~~~

“You said we needed to talk about something. What is it, Dez? You still want to get married?” A tremble in Matt’s voice gave his feelings away. “Oh, Matt! Of course I do. It’s not about that, but that is something else we need to talk about soon.” This talking was rocky territory for her. Previous relationships had always crumbled after the talking got too serious. “It’s about the orchards, and the apiaries Matt. We are seldom together because we each have work in separate places. When we are together we could work well together.” She hesitated, didn’t know how to tell him how she felt. “So, we could work well together. I thought we did. Tell me what you mean. We’ve both had our share of dung-heaps in our lives and survived, so let’s have it.” Dez got up for a glass of water. “Ok. I feel like you don’t trust me to do the same work you do. I just want to know what to do, not have you do it for me.” Matt hung his head. Relieved he had been sure she was going to call it off. Just stay in half of a relationship. “I didn’t know I was doing anything wrong. I guess I’ve just been an orchardist most of my life and it’s all reflex to me.” Dez started to explain herself, but stopped. “Haven’t you had anyone working with you?”

Now it was Matt’s turn to blush. “Of course I have but they were trained or learned quickly.” Dez interrupted. “Any of them women?” They both grinned, smiled and then laughed until they couldn’t speak. Gasping Matt said, “Are you calling me a miso..misogen…..that word?” Dez dried her face on her sleeve. “Not really, but if the shoe fits, Matt!” 

The rest of the evening dissolved into deep discussions of how they could change things. “It will take so much longer, Dez. Going through everything with you.”  Pacing the kitchen, Dez finger combed her hair in frustration, “But Matt, you did that workshop a couple of years ago and you’re a good teacher.You just have to let me do it without killing the trees.” Matt cleared up the table and washed out the coffee pot. “Seriously? You can’t kill the trees; you might not have as many apples the next year, but the trees get over our mistakes.”

The rain had continued through the evening into the night. The couple were still talking about their differences when they went to bed. “Let’s just go to sleep and talk again in the morning. I love you Matt.” Dez turned out the light. Only a night bird sang as the last drops of rain fell. Matt had the last word “I love you Dez.”

“It’s important to make sure that we’re talking with each other 

in a way that heals, not in a way that wounds.”

~ Barack Obama

Picking up the Threads

increasingly restless, 

sometimes anxious.

growing impatience with

what’s next?

In time, family visits by telephone, text, messaging 

and other electronic media have filled many days!

family relationships, growing thin for decades, 

becoming stronger with 

new friendships blossoming. 

I was frightened, insecure and driven in 2020.

purposely stepping back so as not to become a thorn 

Today, I am grateful and still committed to designing

a good and full life with much more to look forward to.

“A gentle heart is tied with an easy thread.”

~ George Herbert

An Ugly Moment

 An Ugly Moment

“Communication is tempered by social mores…”  Carol rolled her eyes and slumped in her chair.  She really didn’t want to be here. Waiting at a fine dining restaurant til late, she’d over heard a lot of ‘communication’. Tempered by what people ate and drank, who they were with, how many were at a table. But what she had overheard in the morning before coming to class had really made her wonder about social mores. And it had offended her. She had had her windows open to the cool morning air. It was overcast, but no wind or rain. Traffic was quiet. A dog barked. She could hear the couple down below her talking quietly. Suddenly threatening, rasping, angry words invaded the air. Epithets and racial slurs strode down the street. Shouting and straining for a fight. “GO HOME!!” There was no response, no running of feet. Just silence.

Carol just kept getting ready for class. There was nothing in the moment that she could do about that incident. There was no communication and absolutely no respect. Social mores - merely a philosophical idea. She straightened in her seat, opened her laptop and prepared to hear more from her professor. Carol decided to go to her professor after class to discuss that unsettling episode.

“Prejudice is a burden that confuses the past, 

threatens the future, and renders the present inaccessible.”

~ Maya Angelou

**This story inspired by an actual event.

Respect - RESPECT - Theme for July 2023

Roving through a meadow full of grasses and daisies……….

Eventide is when the air cools, the traffic thins and days end….

Saturdays come and go every seven days, filled with…….

Phillip was fascinated by his apprenticeship……

Entertaining them was a stressful situation ……

Communication is tempered by social mores……

Tempered glass bears the brunt…….     

“Just as we expect others to value our boundaries, it’s equally 

important for us to respect the boundaries of others.”

~  Laurie Buchanan, PhD

A Cat Tale - The Big Cats!

It went on for the longest time. Big cats growled and paced, the very floor trembled. Creeping into darkness, I stayed until she called me for supper. My belly brushed the floor. I snatched bites and watched for intruders. Not a very enjoyable supper. We don’t always understand each other. This was one time when I didn’t know what ‘Street cleaners’ meant. She didn’t know what my silence and hiding meant.

“I shall look at you out of the corner of my eye, and you will say nothing. 

Words are the source of misunderstandings.”

~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

It's Time ~ 2

It’s time. 

Time for words 

to fill the page ~ 

words that have meaning. 

only silence. 

Scribbles, 

looking for poetry, 

often find a whiff of inspiration

but only scribbles appear. 

air is sterile.

All these words on the page are details ~

details of ordinary life feeling uninspired. 

Today my life was ordinary. 

Not boring because it held the things important to me. 

Reaching out to a friend

Self care at home and in the community

Reading a couple chapters of a popular book

Resting late in the day because it was needed.

Walking against the cold wind was tiring. 

Lumpy, bumpy ice slowed my pace. 

And still there is nothing to write?  

“I tell my students there is such a thing as ‘writers block’, 

and they should respect it. It’s blocked because 

it ought to be blocked, because you haven’t got it right now.”

~ Toni Morrison