Troubled

Out of order troubles me. 

I’ve been troubled for 

the last three days. 

Trapped inside, not by

snow or cold but by 

some virus or germ 

that slipped into my system 

without knocking. A semblance 

of order survived, but much has 

slipped from my grasp until l 

am left staring at the flickering 

flames of my fireplace wondering 

if I’ll ever be healthy again. 

Poor me. 

This temporary setback, 

merely a setback, allows 

a regroup and recovery 

when others watch wildfires 

consume their homes and lives.

To restore order to my small space 

between rest and meals is a privilege.

“Self-pity is never useful. It tends to distort like a fun-house mirror.”

~ Anne Roiphe, journalist

Canada on Fire

Fires

  Devastation

     Tragedies 

In the moment, it does not matter the cause of the horrendous fires burning through our forests, whether climate change or individual human fault. It only matters that homes and all their contents are destroyed or damaged beyond repair. In all of the devastation there is the bravery and determination of the firefighters in the midst of the fires; the resiliency of those evacuated from their homes and the kindness of friends, families and strangers who took the lost into their homes. Our health care system ~ physicians, nurses, all the workers ~ bending once more to these tragedies outside anyone’s immediate control. The special part of all of this is the hearts of humanity on the front lines beating back this violent threat and those offering welcome to those that have been devastated.

“When she awoke, the world was on fire.”

~ Scott Westerfeld, Uglies

Jolted!

Evening Writer's Circle

Welcome, check in, 

meditation….

…….quiet. 

Heads down to computer screens or note pads, 

words and ideas floating and swirling from busy minds to fingertips. 

only the tap of computer keys punctuated the silence……………………..

BONG, BONG, BONG……FLASHING LIGHTS…..

heads snapped up!!……..

What’s that noise?!!!

It’s the fire alarm!!!!…..

Should we leave?!!……

computers, paper, pens disappeared into backpacks and cases,

jackets thrown on, we were led outside by our fearless leader, 

Writer in Residence Pam Bustin, to gather across the street.  

 

Sirens blared from two directions, 

Regina Fire Department was on the scene in minutes, 

from 3 or 4 firetrucks, heavily coated firemen strode into the building…..

.......still no smoke. 

Police on the scene spoke with those of us evacuated about our reasons for being in the library.

Shivering in the cold evening wind, rampant speculation spread about whether there was real fire, wanting someone to tell us what to do next, learning that indeed there had been a fire set in building, pointing up to the second floor. I’m sure details will be in the news at some point. Some of our group had already left for the evening. Just as the last of us were about to call it quits, Pam told us that we were released while the firemen were completed their inspection of the building. In agreement in the cold, we dispersed to home and hearth.

~~~~~

What was I writing on? A project about epilepsy management! The alarm had been right over my head! Thankfully, seizure activity for me has been stable for over 20 years but had it not, it could have been much worse. Has given me pause to think about where alarms are in buildings!

“A jolt activates the mind like nothing else.”

~ Haresh Sippy, author

By the Fireplace ~ A Cat’s Tale

As you can see, I’m quite comfortable. And it’s about time. The windows haven’t been opened for a very long time. When she opens the door to the outside, I just shake my paws and turn away. Fire has always frightened me ~ and yes I do know what fire is. It’s to be avoided at all costs. I don’t have the most handsome tail in the world, but I do not want it burned off. So I watched what flickered like fire and was awfully warm. But it never went anywhere so I watched it carefully for long time. For a while I would just sit and watch it to be certain. Now, I just lay down and doze. When I get too hot, there are all manner of comfortable places for me. I’m certain they are all for me, even though she thinks she should sit in one of my places.

By the way, do you think my human speak is improving? Please don’t tell her if it is. She thinks I don’t know what she’s talking about. And don’t tell her that she makes absolutely no sense when she’s trying to mimic me. 

I'm off now ~ getting too warm here by the fireplace so I’m going to find one of my other beds.

A cat improves a garden wall in sunshine, and the hearth in foul weather.”

~ Judith Merkle Riley (1942 - 2010)

Left Behind

Grand schemes filled 

with hopes and dreams

Crashing

Burning

Leave behind only

smoke and ashes

Unless

Courage

Picks through ash and embers

For charred scraps left behind

Glowing!

Alive!

Ideas arise through acrid smoke

Anger is softened and tears are left behind!

“For the human soul is virtually indestructible, and its ability 

to rise from the ashes remains as long as the body draws breath.”

Author: Alice Miller

*quote taken from quotestats.com

Slow Burn ~ ANGER ~ Theme for March 2022

Anger seems a strange theme to choose for this month. After all, locally, nationally and, in fact worldwide, we have seen anger raging daily for the last two years and is still ongoing. It has moved from pandemic fatigue to war in Europe. Many, if not most, have had valid reasons to be angry. Not all reasons have been very socially acceptable or agreeable. I really do dislike being angry so have become more concerned with the value of anger. 

Across time….

Never, never……

Grand schemes……

Extraordinary……..

Reckless and ………

“Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. 

But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.”

~ Maya Angelou

A Blaze

Not a fire to be put out.

Merely a bush ablaze ~

a glorious nod to autumn.

“How beautifully leaves grow old. 

How full of light and colour are their last days.”

~ John Burroughs

Life and Limb ~ HEAT ~ Theme for July 2021

Here we are…….

Every child…..

A moment in time……

Taking stock……

The Covid19 pandemic is winding down, but not gone. Parts of the world are still reeling. Here in Canada, it is heating up in more ways than one. The temperature is the least of our worries, even though it is a big worry. Fires are lighting up and destroying life and limb. But a deeply serious and long lasting heat is rising from the thousands of children lost to their homes and families. The residential school programs of colonization made a vain attempt to reprogram an entire race through their children, while destroying life and limb. An exercise in genocide. Great bravery and commitment of many individuals surviving this horrendous rending of a long established and beautiful culture has been patiently, steadily waking this country up. 

I am one of the privileged whites who did not understand the depth of this devastation. When I put myself in the shoes of the Indian parents, the shoes of even one Indian child, I edge closer to knowing. Not just understanding intellectually, but knowing that devastation in my heart.

“Once parents came to be viewed as the ‘enemy’, 

their criticisms, no matter how valid, could be discounted.”

~ The Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada, 

Final Report of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada, 

Volume One: Summary: Honouring the Truth, Reconciling for the Future

Haze

Orange and golden 

before the sun sets down 

haze in the sky

too high 

no smell of smoke

in the prairie azure blue

gigantic fires rage 

on the western edge 

frantic fire fighters 

do battle against 

ferocious tongues of 

roaring vicious flames.

“Smoke veils the air like souls in drifting suspension, 

declining the war’s insistence everyone move on.”

~ Jayne Anne Phillips, Lark & Termite

One Sided

One Sided

“Rates of speed on this highway are pathetic!! Who sets them

anyway!? And the drivers! People that always trundle along at exactly….I mean exactly…..the speed limit. Not a kilometre over or under but exactly!!! I was speeding along, with that great Billy Idol driving song Blue Highway turned up full blast…..it was awesome. Turned around a bend in the highway and there it was. A poky little old station wagon that must have been 50 years old. And this driver!! She could barely see over the steering wheel! She had a nerve being on the road. A typical Speed Limit Nerd. I couldn’t pass because we were coming up to another turn on this amazing mountain road and I couldn’t see if I’d hit a semi or a deer or anything else! And then there’s the ghastly forest fires…..yah I know they were miles away but there was a lot of smoke! I wanted to get the hell out of there! So I had to slow waaaaay down to match this crazy woman's ridiculous speed……Road rage? What? You think even this sounds like road rage? The air was as blue as her blue hair!! I mean really….what if I had to get to a hospital? Or what if you had just texted me that my house was burning down!?……....................................Roxanne just hung up on me!! What did I say?”

“Smile, breathe and go slowly”
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

Slip Stream

Yoda knows the questions

still unanswered by youngsters

of each decade swimming 

in the slip stream of time.

Wisdom, growing in strength,

as a tall evergreen pine tree

from a pine cone 

split open by wild fire

or as the spreading dandelion

from the seed fluff sailing

in a roiling wind or a child’s puff of breath.

“Everything flows and nothing abides, 

everything gives way and nothing stays fixed.”

~ Heraclitus

Yoda - legendary Jedi Master from the movie Star Wars (Star Wars Databank) who trained Jedi for over 800 years.

Honouring the Fallen

Treating each day without care, taking for granted the blue of the sky, the warmth of the sun on our faces was challenged by the plaintive lament of bagpipes. Two white tents seen from the sidewalk and a crowd gathering behind the Victoria legislature, lands of these parliament buildings and surrounding areas are located on the traditional territories of the Lekwungen people. Walking with a friend who alerted me to the tents, I followed my curiosity, strolling onto the lawn towards a gathering crowd. Quickly I saw many uniformed firefighters and recognized what was possibly a memorial service. I decided to remain and take in this opportunity to witness the ceremony that was about to unfold. This ceremony was to honour the fifteen firefighters who had lost their lives in the past year. Honoured were firefighters from Trail, Vancouver, Burnaby, Surrey and Trail. Tearful members of their families received flags of honour. The uniformed parade of firefighters, men and women, filled the streets around the Legislature with their strength, numbers and music. This ceremony was extremely moving to this curious bystander. 

“But aloud the praises, and give the victor-crown. 

To our noble hearted Firemen, who fear not danger’s frown.”

~ Fredric G.W.Fenn

An Old Story of Nurses

Let me tell you

a story

of the resiliency of nurses:

We care for the sick even

when the sick is a colleague 

with no other to fill their shift.

Young or old we jump into the fray

in all the many years of nurses ~

for the young, a trial by the fire of need.

It’s a story as old as nursing ~

we care for each other while

we care for sick patients all the same.

“Fortitude is the guard and support of the other virtues.”

~ John Locke

On the Edge ~ 1

August 2017 on Number One
on the way through Alberta
Last years forest fire.

We’re on the edge of a crucible ~

a crucible of roaring, raging fire and wind

long flicking fingers of flame grasping at fuel

across and into the forest floor of once peaceful debris.

Greedily licking 

crumbling bark before

consuming ancient trees only to send
bursts of cruel embers and ash ~

scouts and emissaries tracking

more fuel to feed the hungry beast

set loose by man.

But we’re only on the edge ~

Smoke, clinging to trees and buildings

darkening the air, hangs breathlessly

carrying particles, gases and moisture

as it drifts away from the crucible

into our cities and towns, farms and villages.

But we’re only on the edge

where the sun throws pale shadows

glowing eerily orange through 

frayed remnants of the firestorm.

Ghostly fragments reach stealthily

into lungs and burrow into life

while I do my laundry.

But we’re only on the edge ~

the edge of a crucible

where brave souls edge 

closer to fire-hot edges of heat and flame.

Miniature gladiators battle passionately 

against the Earth’s angry response 

to humanity’s carelessness, disrespect and greed.

“Aside from forest fire, there’s nothing to be afraid of in the woods, 

except yourself. If you’ve got sense, you can keep out of trouble. 

If you haven’t got sense, you’ll get into trouble, here or anywhere else.”

~ Louise Dickinson Rich, We Took to the Woods