Our Town

Spread out before us, 

sharing the prairie with grasshoppers, sunshine, 

steady wind and cloud 

sculptures in the sky.

Spread out before us 

was our childhood ~ 

parents, aunts, uncles, 

cousins and neighbours, storekeepers, school teachers

Nostalgia ~ a sweet soft ache.

“Family matters because I love my roots and traditions, and 

I carry them with me. I respect my ancestors, and I know who I am.”

~ Belén Gallardo, memoirist, biographer

When You Can

It was never about making the right choices. How ever could I know the truth of each hour, 

of each day, and the years that would pass. It was, and is always, about honouring my 

mother who left us on this day in 1971. Seems such a long time but only a few hours 

ago. When I feel sadness, I know that hers was deeper; 

when I am tired, I know she 

was exhausted, and when I am despairing in my life, 

I know that her despair was chained to her. It was, 

and is always, about honouring my mother.

”I will love you even when I am dust on the wind.”

~Nalini Singh,  Archangel’s Blade

988: Suicide Crisis Helpline 24/7 anywhere in Canada

Crumpled Beauty

The crumpled beauty of this dying dahlia letting go of youthful splendour is too often ignored by my curiosity. A flower only to be dead-headed and tossed aside into golden leaves and grass clippings mulching below. 

“Flowers grow out of dark moments.”

~ Corita Kent

Future Designs

Here’s a couple of real fun questions…..
Where would you like to go when you die?
What is your perfect afterlife?

I’m not big on thinking about death. 
Especially my own. 
At 69 - and some would say early in year seventy - 
thoughts of death are just a bit too close for comfort.

Ah, but that second question - 
What is my perfect afterlife?

It is an afterlife of great beauty and enchanting stories

• and no money - no greed - no fighting

An afterlife full of colour, music and dancing
balanced with deep silence and even deeper peace

And a lot of discussion of 
Philosophy, theology and ethics
Maybe with Socrates and Plato, 
Aristotle and Hippocrates

All of us sitting around a granite fountain in our fine woven togas
Blue sky, great white mountains of clouds and brilliant sunshine
Flowers, trees and whatever landscape that fit the discussion.
And dogs - big dogs, sleek and beautiful  - just because they are fun
And glorious, handsome cats - if they deign to share their afterlife with me.

Family and friends?
Each of us have our own earthly lives - and in this muse
We each have our own afterlife
With visits of love and joy coming with merely a beckoning thought

So if there is an afterlife ~
and I won’t know if there is one
‘til I trip over the fine line between life and death ~
I can dream of any kind of perfection that I choose.

“There is a place called ‘heaven’ 

where the good here unfinished is completed; 

and where the stories unwritten, and the hopes unfulfilled, 

are continued. We may laugh together yet.”

~ J.R.R.Tolkein

To Celebrate

A conversation about births

About deaths

About joy and excitement 
Welcoming new life into the world

About caring in sadness and loss
Saying goodbye to ageless and aged lives leaving this world

There is great love and expectation 
For the new lives we are honoured to welcome

There is great love and a breathless open hand
In the care we are honoured to give as we say good-bye

It is easy and a joy to say hello
With great determination and sadness we say our good-bye.

“What life expects of us is that we celebrate.”

~ José Eduardo Agualusa, The Book of Chameleons

Movie Review: Mockingjay Part 2 directed by Francis Lawrence

Pardon the flash on the poster!

I confess. The only one of the Hunger Games series that I have seen is the first:  The Hunger Games. Nor have I read this fascinating trilogy by Suzanne Collins. Fascinating, because in the first movie, teenagers were ‘chosen’ by a dictator to compete in a nationally televised event called the Hunger Games. This competition was to the death. The relationships began in this movie in 2012.

I had a bit of a concern that I’d not be able to follow some of the story line or character relationships, however went into the movie hoping and believing it would be made to stand alone. And stand alone it did. The tension and speed of the story was incredible. There was no time to worry about any previous relationships or history. In this movie, the goal of the original Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) and her followers, is to stop the killing that has become a never ending cycle. To accomplish this President Snow (Donald Sutherland) must be assasinated. President Coin (Julianne Moore), the leader of the rebels clearly has her own political goals. The perception was that the leadership of either side could not be trusted. I definitely recommend this movie for those that want a dystopian setting, sensational scenes and well balanced tension and relief.

An interesting aside, Philip Seymour Hoffman, now deceased had completed all by two weeks of his role in all four of the movies before his untimely death. Lionsgate Productions made a statement regarding ‘work-around issues’ to be done that were ‘up to the best of his craft’. It was very sensitively done.

“My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am seventeen years old. 

My home is District 12. I was in the Hunger Games. 

I escaped. The Capitol hates me.”

~ Suzanne Collins, Mockingjay

Movies: The Hunger Games (2012), Catching Fire (2013), Mockingjay Part 1 (2014), Mockingjay Part 2 (2015)
Books: The Hunger Games (2008), Catching Fire (2009), and Mockingjay (2010)

Directed by Francis Lawrence

Partial Cast:
Jennifer Lawrence - Katniss Everdeen
Josh Hugherson - Peeta Mellark
Liam Hemsworth - Gale Hawthorne
Woody Harrelson - Haymitch Abernathy
Donald Sutherland - President Snow
Philip Seymour Hoffman  - Plutarch Heavensbee
Julianne Moore - President Alma Coin
Willow Shields - Primrose Everdeen
Sam Claflin - Finnick Odair
Elden Henson - Pollux

A Joyful Proverb

This month’s writing assignment in the Writer’s Ink group I belong to, was a difficult and awkward one.  One of the group heard a very colourful Haitian proverb quoted. Again, each of us had a different take on our topic. One member was able to write a quite a humorous piece!

This is my contribution:

A Joyful Proverb

“We are all walking with our coffins under our arms.”

Images from this Haitian proverb leapt into my mind, the metaphor lost in processions of stunned humanity walking towards their death in WWII Nazi Germany, ‘lookie lou’s’ running way out on beaches emptying as water receded just before the tsunami onslaught in December, 2004 or most recently the climbers on Mount Everest shaken from their perches by the violent Nepalese earthquake. And the riots, marches and protests when individuals of any race, place or time share their participation against towering and powerful foes.

Extreme disasters aside, for my own sense of immediacy, I needed a kinder, gentler approach to this colourful metaphor spoken by Haitian mothers to their children, one that applied to ordinary life/death situations. Death and coffins really have a bad reputation - fear of the unknown comes to mind along with the connotation that no one should ever have to choose their coffin, or have to meet with Death.

That however, is not especially realistic. It is rather arrogant, and futile, to fight against Death as we are all going to participate in that event anyway. So, a kinder and gentler interpretation of this most serious proverb is one of joy. It is interesting that, when I imagine someone speaking of ‘carrying our coffins under our arms’, in my mind the individual is saying it with laughter! And so the twist to this story is not about Death and coffins, but about how we choose to live our lives. The humility with which we live our lives, accepting circumstances as they come, working with circumstance to better our families and communities, determines how light or heavy the ‘coffin under our arm’ will be.

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life, A man 

who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”

~ Mark Twain

Overload

Media reports full of information about

health care, 

and the strength to recover, 

war and political struggles
and the courage to question.

The challenge remains

to beware

to be afraid

to know that danger is close

to mistrust others

and now

to mistrust ourselves

And yet

To trust the science because we are told to

To trust the science because of science’s track record

To believe in the science because the science is always right

To trust our governments

Technology

with sensors everywhere

globally and at home

In our phones

In our homes

In our vehicles

and now 

In the mattresses of our beds

Will all of this be inspiration for us

to regain belief in our internal sensors

of emotion

of belief

of intelligence

of wisdom?

Birth, life and death

Scientific

Politicized

Automated

Medicalized

“Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge?

Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?”

~ T.S.Eliot

Reality Glows in the Dark

How do you take a picture of the dark?

Stepping away from a store late this evening the light suddenly changed.

Up and down Oak Bay Avenue stores and banks, street lights and Christmas decor went dark.

Synchronized and in unison, the street rolled up with customers still in motion.

How do you follow the reality of darkness?

Driving home, expectations for street light guidance were unfulfilled.

No magic lines of a power grid, with lights in houses, along streets and in businesses, showed the way ~

Darkness from Oak Bay, through Fairfield to Beacon Hill Park.

When the lights finally came back on 

when electricity flowed once more

news of Nelson Mandela’s death flooded through radio waves.

Darkness for a moment in time in a Victoria winter?

Acting on the darkness of a country and culture

Imprisoned for 27 years

Family fractured and torn

Nelson Mandela humbly shared many moments in time with his nation and the world despite the reality of his political and personal darkness.

“What counts in life is not the mere fact that we have lived. 

It is what difference we have made to the lives of others 

that will determine the significance of the life we lead.”

~ Nelson Mandela

The Time of my Dying is not...

....today or even next year.

I’ve made up my mind.

I don't have time to be old!

Hibernation would be my choice, but for today ~

hiding myself away in a bed alone and covered to my eyebrows seems rather boring, don’t you think?

As long as I can, I’ll continue every morning to get myself dressed, ready for challenges of the mundane and the fun.

I am certainly  ~ most definitely ~

not at the stage where my bottom has to be wiped by a stranger!

There are days when I'm pretty darn tired........

Today, I’m going to get my hair done.

My shoulders are too stiff to do much more than 

pat hair spray to keep my curly locks in place.

Then I’m off to the library for more books.

I always longed for time to read,

whatever and for however long I wanted.

A favourite topic is the time of dying - my dying, although no one's written anything about me.

Are you offended or shocked?

Using the word dying?

Applying it to myself?

And to now?

We often think of it as though it must always be

Sudden! Tragic!

And oh, so very Sad.

A thing ~ not a process ~ that all of us go to, and through, unwillingly.

We don’t think of the Choice to cuddle into the going out,

as we were cuddled into our entering in.

Certainly some deaths are tragic in Unexpected Suddenness,

just as some births are tragic in Unexpected Suddenness

And there are Births and Deaths occurring on the same day no less!

Spirits joining in the moment to give each other directions.

One spirit sliding into home at the beginning of this earthly game.

One spirit soaring into heights unknown at earthly game’s end.

In Death personality unravels ~ a person passes from family large or small.

Unknown soul direction into the great beyond to be wished for, speculated about and believed in.

In Birth, personality not yet molded ~ a child born to family large or small.

Soul’s direction into this world to be wished for, speculated about and believed in.

“Nobody grows old merely by living a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Years may wrinkle our skin, 

but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.”

~ Samuel Ullman

Engaging with Life

I began this morning’s muse with thoughts of engaging with life.

Appreciate the moment.

Pay attention to body messages.

Take time for yourself.

Give yourself enough time in the morning to make the day your own first.

(When children and families involved this may be no easy task!)

In conversation

On radio

On television

it is often said that an individual has ‘lost their battle with ______’ 

(fill in the blank with the name of a disease).

This troubles me because Battle brings

images of blood and gore

stories of aggression and stealth.

memories of helplessness in the face of dying and death.

Unpleasant and frightening all.

A couple of hours later, on CBC’s Cross Country Check-up

(Suhanna Meharchand was hosting for Rex Murphy today)

the question was about assisted suicide due to the recent Supreme Court decision in BC.

My thoughts about engaging with life

seemed trivial and insignificant.

However, the more I listened the more I returned to 

my belief that engaging with life

in sickness

in health

when death comes knocking, or sneaking in the back door,

is an important piece of self care so frequently missing.

Will engaging in life by 

healthy diet

healthy relationships

regular exercise

regular sleep patterns

spontaneous, and sometimes outrageous, fun and games

prevent disease?

Engaging with life may not prevent disease,

however learning to live in the moment

teaches how to roll with the bumps in the road

and whatever else might be in the way.

Engaging with life teaches us how to be present ~

to look in the face the pleasant and the unpleasant.

to honour our lives from birth to death.

“Invent your world. Surround yourself with 

people, color, sounds and work that nourish you.”

~ Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy