Actively seeking tidy endings in life has always seemed difficult for me. Whether the ending of something I’m writing, a good-bye for a life change, the story in a great movie or book, or sadly, a loved one’s life. However, when I look carefully at endings, despite the belief that endings are the hardest part, I see that the ending is really not the hard part. It is when my heart has been gripped with the fear of losing someone or something that has been exciting, precious and usually life changing. The fear is also that I will never experience or feel a love as great or as lovely as what has ended. The truth is that, within each love, ~ a mother’s love, a job, a boyfriend, a community ~ there is no replacement. What remains is a cherished memory. Letting my fear and uncertainty block the joy of new experiences has great potential to numb our lives. The truth is that letting go of fear and uncertainty is really the hardest part. It becomes rather like a Chinese finger trap ~ keeping my heart and mind immobile, focussed only on being trapped. I will only be able to find freedom when I relax, opening my hands and my heart to new experiences and opportunities.
“The best way to find out what we really need is to get rid of what we don’t.”
~ Marie Kondō
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