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Thursday, November 23, 2023

Feeling the Years

I don’t know if I’ve ever been afraid of my age ~ all because of an invisible and mighty virus. The fearful ideas in my head clung to the virus as if it were a life raft. I’ve had numerous bouts of upper respiratory illnesses over the years, but with each decade, they seem more vicious. I’ve been taking this one personally. After all, I don’t have time to be laid low for over a week wondering if I will ever recover. 


Imagining myself incapacitated and trapped in infirmity. My writing practice has suffered; the order in my home has suffered. My habit of putting one foot in front of the other has stood me in good stead. Listening to my body telling me to stand still slowly to get past this bump in the road has eased my fears. 


Having watched a lot of news programs, I reminded myself of those without a home, without finances, without access to a family physician, without family or friends, without food………until I could rest and be grateful.


“Because there is no glory in illness. 

There is no meaning to it. 

There is no honor in dying of.”

 ~ John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

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